Posted In Personal Power | Posted On 13 Feb 2020 | Posted By Salenta Fox
This is me in South Africa right before my divorce in 2008. That year was a biggie. We were uber successful in our business the year before and January 2008 I decided to work on our/my personal life.
Be careful what you ask for.
By March I had already done two personal development trainings that just fell in my lap and I realized the relationship I was in was abusive, controlling, and killing my soul.
I realized too it was because of me allowing what was going on by not speaking up to "keep the peace"! I created this situation as much as he had.
That was when I "found love". I found a book, Conversations With God by Neal Donald Walsch. It tapped me into the spiritual person I am. I was always very religious by never thought I was as spiritual as those around me. Mostly because I did everything required but never 'felt' the spirit or what others seemed to feel or experience. I read the book and this version of "God" was the one I always felt connected too, this God was LOVE. The real life unconditional kind of love not the judgement "do what I say or you're damed to hell" kind of God I knew from church.
From that moment I decided to act from love no matter what in each situation.
I did and as I did the disfunction started to unravel. I started standing up for myself, in love. I started to speak up, in love. I started to express myself more fully, in love. Instead of being the person, mother, wife I thought I needed to be (I was good at that) I started being the person I AM!!
Yes, it was scary. Yes, things started to fall apart. And yes, the people playing within the disfunction did not like it. But what it did do was break those dysfunctional cycles in a very manageable way because I was calm, grounded, and felt empowered in a loving way instead of aggressive way, which often happens when someone takes their power back.
I went on a trip back to South Africa in November that year and expanded myself into more of who I am, I felt free to express me for the first time since I could remember. It was liberating.
That was the beginning.
By the end of December 2008 the divorce was final. I was free not only in spirit but of that partnership too. And my journey to explore, expand and find out what this love thing actually was/is began.
Find your anchor of truth to guide you through your dark night to find your light.
That first year I read and interviewed people all around the world in my travels on what love was to them. I meditated, yoga-ed, unraveled for a year just to come back to me. And then, the next year, I read nothing, went within, still meditated more, wrote a lot.
What I found on the other side of this inward search were truths others had found too validating to me the validity of my new soul understandings.
Where in your life do you deserve to add more love? Which situations in your life are you contributing to dysfunction, judgement, and conditional love? These are innocent questions but powerful catalysts for immense inner transformation if you are ready for it.
Love, love, love you always.
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Salenta is an Energy Psychology Practitioner and Guide to change-makers seeking inner alignment, authentic power, and freedom. She clears energetic blocks & limiting beliefs to fully express and align to who you are and BE your contribution, creating system change in the world.